There's been many times I wished I could bring him to school and show him off to all of my friends. I wish they could've known him the way I did. I wish they could see his face and hear his voice. I wish he could come eat lunch with me. I wish he could be there when I graduate. I wish he could meet all of the amazing people I now call my friends. I wish he could see how much I've learned and how well I am doing in school.
I just wish so much that if I closed my eyes tight enough, and begged hard enough, that he could just appear. I would smile so big and cry at the same time. I'd want to show him everything. How much I missed him. I'd show him all the things people have done in his honor. Remi could smell him and remember who his daddy is. I'd make him drive me around in the truck. I'd drag him to school for a facial. :) I'd make him dinner again, with a new recipe. I'd take him out for beers. I'd show him my tattoos for him(he loved tattoos). I'd ask him if he heard my prayers or when I talked to the stars. I'd ask him if he really has been my angel this whole time. I'd ask him why? I'd hold him and never want to let go. Most of all I'd tell him how much I love him and tell him to say it to me, over and over again.
I miss him so much. I just wish he could spend just one more day with me. Here and now and I could die happy. We always said we hoped we would die together. If he came back for a visit, I'd tell him to hold my hand, fall asleep with me, and that it was ok to take me with him.
None of this will ever happen. So until it is my time to meet you in the stars, I will see you in my dreams baby. When that day comes, just know I have so much to tell you. So much love to give you. So much untouched time we have to make up for. I love you.