Thursday, October 21, 2010


No other word to describe how I feel right now. I don't feel like writing too much because I will just start crying again...

Watching Chad get on that bus and leave literally felt like getting my heart ripped out of my chest. I had no idea I was going to break down so bad. I couldn't stop shaking and crying. I had to leave and drive home without him. I had to wave goodbye and kiss him for the last time.. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my entire life. My whole heart is leaving for 7 months and I can't believe we have to do this again. I'm sad he wont be here in the house with me, I wont be able to cook for him, love on him, and enjoy his company. But most of all, I can't do anything to keep him safe.. I feel so worthless. I want this to be over with and for him to be home. I love him so much.. I hate this.

Maybe when I feel more up to it I will post more pictures...but for now I don't want to do anything but lay in bed and cry.

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